In his books, Bob Burg discusses the three steps of building
relationships with other people, whether they may be business owners,
prospects, customers, clients, family, friends, or everyone else. We do
business with those who we know, like, and trust. We provide referrals to those
who we know, like, and trust. We build relationships with those who we know,
like, and trust.
How do we get to know anyone? When we first meet someone we must
attempt to get to know who they are, how they operate their business, and what
kind of person they are. This requires some work on our part. We should devote time
to meeting with them, having maybe several conversations with them, and asking
questions. If they are forthcoming, we decide if they are people with whom we
want to form a relationship.
Maybe we ask them how long they have lived wherever they
are, where they lived before, how they began their business, and how they are
building it. If they are in career transition, or want to be, what do they want
to do, what are their dreams, and how have they determined what their aspirations
are? What are their hobbies, and how do they spend their time when they aren’t
working?
Then we must decide if we actually like the other person. We
might be able to build a relationship with someone whom we don’t like, but it
is very difficult to do so with a person that we actually dislike. There is a difference
between not liking someone and disliking them. What is there about them that we
dislike? Is it their attitude, their interpersonal skills, their intelligence,
or their appearance?
Never, ever, prejudge someone before attempting to discover
more facts about them. As we discover more and more information about someone
we may find that we actually were wrong in our initial impression. We may find
out that we like someone, but we may also discover that we actually dislike
them. Facts will help us be correct.
The last step is trust. Trust should not come easily and
must be the true basis for any business relationship. If we are to refer
someone to anyone else, we must trust both parties. That means that we are
risking our reputation with both of the parties and have the trust to do that.
Referrals are a two way street, and we must know, like, and trust both parties.
We might get a referral wrong sometimes, but we are only human.
Trust also means that we can rely on the other party to
provide advice that is meaningful and supportive, but it is always truthful. If
two parties have the other’s success in mind, they must attempt to help the
other towards that success, even if it means being totally truthful and not
just saying what they want us to say.
As we practice Gratitude Marketing we should look to
building relationships before we attempt to sell whatever we offer. Through the
3 steps of getting to know each other, deciding if we like each other, and
becoming trustful of each other, we can build strong relationships that will
return business and referrals to all of us.
Nice post, Jim. Thanks for some good advice.
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