Last week the topic of this blog’s posting was “Schmooze, Don’t Sell”. I received several emails and telephone calls from readers asking me to expand on this subject. I also heard stories, some good, some bad, and some embarrassing to at least one of the parties involved. This week I thought that I would add some thoughts regarding this subject.
We learn from exchanging information and gathering
facts. We develop our opinion of others
from asking questions of them, listening to their replies, and observing their
actions. When we first meet someone who
may become a networking partner with us, we need to meet that person more often
and begin the process of establishing some common ground for the continuing
relationship. We need to ask probing,
informational questions that allow us to get to know the other person. We need to gather facts and process what we
learn.
From our information gathering, we learn about the other
person and develop either a liking or dislike for them. I don’t know about you, but I have a
difficult time doing business with someone whom I do not like. I have an even more difficult time if I
develop a mistrust of them. I certainly
will never refer someone else to anyone whom I do not trust. I value my reputation too much for that to
ever occur. You must be able to trust
all parties that you involve in a referral relationship. They will remember who put them together.
People do business with others that they know, like, and
trust. The same rule holds
true for when someone refers business to anyone. They must know the person, more that a casual
hello at a one-time meeting. Do you
really “know” the person to whom you are referring someone else? This should also be true about the person
that you are referring to someone. You
must know that each party to a referral will treat the other party with respect
and honesty. Otherwise at least one of
the parties will learn that you are someone with whom they should not do
business, someone whom they cannot trust to think of their best interests.
Must you like someone to do business with them, to refer
business to them, or refer them to someone else? I say that you must, after all you are
putting money into their pockets. How
can you dislike someone and still help them to succeed? Maybe the reason for your dislike should come
into a discussion. Why do you dislike
them? Are they dishonest, do they
practice bad customer service or do they not honor their promises? Do they fail to correct their mistakes, take
responsibility for errors, or make the customer whole? If these are the reasons for not liking
someone, I agree and would not refer anyone to them.
If you like someone, do you trust them? Do they practice trustworthy business practices? Do they conduct their personal lives in a
trustworthy manner? You must trust
someone to do business with them unless you take extreme measures to protect
yourself. I do not want to do business
that way, nor do I want to recommend someone do business with anyone where
those protective measures need to be in place.
My reputation is very valuable to me, and it is what precedes me
everywhere that I go. It also is what I
leave behind when I leave somewhere.
Yours is the same.
When you meet someone, get to know them, learn whether you
like them, and then decide if you can trust them. Also, learn the “why” behind each of these
steps. Knowing “why” allows you to
believe in what you have done and helps you teach others to build their
businesses in a similar manner. Leave
your comments here to share, or email me at Jim@SOC4Now.com, or call me at 360-314-8691. Then get on with
learning, liking, and trusting, if possible.
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